And here I am... -home-

This is my 2^nd nite I’ve woken up at nite, after sleeping for few hours. Jetlag. Still. But I love the atmosphere. Feels so home :)

Before I came back home, I had been spending nights with so many different people.

Malam-malam kita berbeza. Ada yang begitu. Ada yang begini.

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I spent few nights at Dr.Hady’s house in Leeds. He and his wife had gone to Mecca for Hajj. Mak Long was the caretaker for their 2 kids, 4 year old Ammar and almost a year Khadeeja. Mak Long was accompanied by her 2 nieces.

That nite when I came to their house, Ammar was so excited to see me. “Kakak Anis! Kakak Anis!” He shouted excitedly when I was outside knocking on the door. When I got in, he jumped happily while hugging my legs. Felt so touched.. At least I could make him happy 4 a while, while his parents were away. Probably he felt lonely being left. Sepi tanpa Ayah dan Mama. Even tho he had the caretakers around him.

Baby Khadeeja was almost recovering from chicken pox. There were juz scars or the scabs on her body. She was so adorable. Happy and not so hard to be taken cared of. I was always wondering how Mak Long would take care of a baby who was still breastfeeding, n now apart from the mum. Luckily she was not that problematic, n adapting well.

It was only few nights that time, had to go back to Bradford. And as Mak Long said, Ammar could not handle goodbye n tends to ignore people that gonna leave him. Guess they don’t feel sepi anymore, their parents were back days ago.

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I spent few nights at Kak B’s house before going back to Malaysia. She lives with her boy Irsyad, 5. I remember last time when I was bout to go back, Irsyad was crying and not allowing me to go. I felt so bad.. Coz he felt lonely playing toys and watching tv all by himself, while her mum studying. Even tho I was juz there to watch him watched tv n played toys, it did make him feel better. When I was trying to have a nap, he woke me up so that I stayed awake to accompany him. I had to agree with him to go back and do my work and come back again that night. And yes, I was juz saying it to persuade him. I only came back the next week.

And as for Kak B, I respect her for enduring everything since they two started to live in UK few months ago. It is hard for her to go through everything without her hubby at her side. But she always motivates herself that they have made the decision, to live with Irsyad in Bradford while doing her PhD, while husband in Malaysia. Sepi. But time will heal. I’m glad that sometimes I can accompany them, to make their home less lonely. At least.

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I live with my roomie Hebe, in Bradford, in a studio. As for her, she’s back in Singapore for Xmas hols, nothing much for her in Bradford. Meeting her bf there will erase all lonely feelings that she feels in UK.

As for myself, I knew I was gonna feel lonely, especially when Hebe back in Singapore. I used to live on my own when I was in 1^st year, I lived without any close friends in halls n I survived that. But lately, I juz couldn’t stand it and I really really missed home. I really wanted to meet my parents, stay at home peacefully, away from the coldness of freezing winter in UK and layers of clothing. I juz didn’t feel happy in UK that time (probably winter depression) and really had to be in a place that I would feel belong to.

Only papa n mama at home. Any1 can guess how they feel. 1 sister at work in Kemaman, 2 sisters n post-SPM brother in KL. Only Bobo, their white cat at home to accompany them.

And sepi brought me home…