Di saat aku mengeluh kelaparan, teringat anak-anak orang miskin yang belum tentu ada makanan hari ini
Di saat aku mengeluh kepenatan, teringat pada pekerja-pekerja buruh kasar yang bekerja di bawah terik panas matahari
Di saat aku berasa jauhnya tempat parking kereta dari tempat kerja, dah la balik kompem jalan jem, teringat orang lain yang terpaksa bersesak-sesak dalam komuter, lrt atau pun bas ketika pulang bekerja
Kalau ikutkan, ada saja benda yang nak dirungutkan..tapi bila teringat yang keadaan aku adalah lebih menyenangkan sebenarnya, kupanjatkan segala kesyukuran pada Ya Rabbi dan tak jadi merungut..
Paling penting sekarang, aku masih ada 5 itu:
1) Sihat tubuh badan..cukup semua anggota..tak ada penyakit kronik. Setiap kali rasa malas dan lemah itu datang, aku teringat pada insan-insan lain yang hidup dengan bantuan tong oksigen, kaki dan tangan palsu, tongkat untuk berjalan mahupun kecacatan fizikal yang tidak dapat dibaiki, dan aku akan rasa malu pada mereka jika aku merungut pada fizikalku yang sempurna ini..
2)Kaya yang tak kaya mana tapi duit masih ada..masih boleh beli barang-barang keperluan. Tak perlu sampai ikat perut dan guna barang-barang ekonomi yang belum tentu kualitinya terjamin..dan setiap kali rasa tidak puas hati itu datang, aku teringat pada insan-insan lain yang masih menggunakan barang-barang dan pakaian lama sedangkan aku mampu membeli yang baru maka terhentilah rungutanku..
3)Usiaku yang masih muda, bertenaga dan segar..kadang-kadang rasa jugak macam dah tak muda bila asyik kene panggil kakak je kan, tapi bila kudengar rintihan dari yang tua-tua, aku ni muda sangat sebenarnya dan banyak yang perlu kukejar dan tanggungjawab yang perlu dilunaskan sebelum tua tiba dan mengurangkan kebolehanku..
4)Masa lapang yang masih ada..walaupun kadang-kadang rasa sangat sibuk sampai tak sempat buat perkara-perkara penting tapi tu semua tipu..semua orang ada 24 jam sehari. Dan waktu sempitku selalu datang tatkala aku leka dengan masa lapang yang tidak diuruskan dengan bijak..
5)Dan nafasku ini, membuktikan aku masih hidup, masih bernyawa untuk meneruskan tugasku sebagai hambaNya. Hari-hari kudengar berita kematian, banyak yang mati dengan cara yang ngeri; dibunuh, dilanggar, lemas dan sebagainya, dan sungguh aku takut. Tak mustahil suatu hari nanti giliran aku pula, cuma doaku biarlah aku mati dalam husnil khotimah, mati di jalan Allah, paling koman pun syahid kecil..mati ketika beranak ke kan tapi wallahua'lam..
Segala puji bagiMu Ya Allah, namun kutahu Engkau mahu hamba-hambaMu sentiasa berusaha untuk maju ke hadapan..kerana tiada siapa yang dapat mengubah nasib kami melainkan kami sendiri...
"Apabila kamu telah selesai dari suatu urusan, maka kerjakanlah dengan sungguh-sungguh urusan yang lain"
Surah Al-Insyirah, ayat 7
Showing posts with label Aku emo. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Aku emo. Show all posts
July 21, 2010
July 13, 2010
Why choose to be angry?
Why? It's just a CHOICE. So why don't we choose to be cool, and find a solution to that anger-awakening situation.I dunno if I'm really in the category of a patient person, but I find it hard for me to get angry (hope so). Thanks to people around me, they have showed me that patience can really reward sweet fruit, though it is bitter initially.
When we get angry, something is burning inside us that we can feel the heat. So before the heat turns into fire and burns everything around it, cool ourselves down by being patient and use our minds to control the angry emotion.
I had this experience going to this chinese acupuncture treatment. Before that, the doctor checked my blood pressure and tongue. She looked at my tongue, it was shaking with some dark spots. Her diagnosis was I kept holding back my feelings and not sharing it with others. She said if I had problems, juz let them out and feel happy again. I just smiled cause I didn't know if the diagnosis was right, but when compared to my friend, her tongue was not shaking and healthily pink...
Well she may be right to a certain extent, but what can I do. I can't express every bad thing I feel, for the purpose of maintaining good relationship and making sure everything is ok and under control. When I express dissatisfaction, it might cause tense in the atmosphere but when I hold back, it is bad for my health?? Oh..dilemma..
Nevertheless, my point is, to always be patient. Sometimes I know I am in the right position to get angry, but I am just not good at it anymore. I remember I scolded my juniors when I was in my high school because I was so angry and not able to hold it back. What happened next was they were shocked and I felt very bad that I realized nothing good could come out of being angry.
It will just burn you and people around you.
Sabda Rasulullah SAW yang bermaksud,
“Bukanlah orang kuat itu yang mempertontonkan otot dalam perkelahian, sesungguhnya orang yang kuat itu adalah orang yang mampu menguasai (emosi) dirinya pada saat ia sedang marah.”
(HR AI-Bukhari dan Muslim dari Abu Hurairah)
When we get angry, something is burning inside us that we can feel the heat. So before the heat turns into fire and burns everything around it, cool ourselves down by being patient and use our minds to control the angry emotion.
I had this experience going to this chinese acupuncture treatment. Before that, the doctor checked my blood pressure and tongue. She looked at my tongue, it was shaking with some dark spots. Her diagnosis was I kept holding back my feelings and not sharing it with others. She said if I had problems, juz let them out and feel happy again. I just smiled cause I didn't know if the diagnosis was right, but when compared to my friend, her tongue was not shaking and healthily pink...
Well she may be right to a certain extent, but what can I do. I can't express every bad thing I feel, for the purpose of maintaining good relationship and making sure everything is ok and under control. When I express dissatisfaction, it might cause tense in the atmosphere but when I hold back, it is bad for my health?? Oh..dilemma..
Nevertheless, my point is, to always be patient. Sometimes I know I am in the right position to get angry, but I am just not good at it anymore. I remember I scolded my juniors when I was in my high school because I was so angry and not able to hold it back. What happened next was they were shocked and I felt very bad that I realized nothing good could come out of being angry.
It will just burn you and people around you.
Sabda Rasulullah SAW yang bermaksud,
“Bukanlah orang kuat itu yang mempertontonkan otot dalam perkelahian, sesungguhnya orang yang kuat itu adalah orang yang mampu menguasai (emosi) dirinya pada saat ia sedang marah.”
(HR AI-Bukhari dan Muslim dari Abu Hurairah)
July 2, 2010
What's wrong with me??!!
The price of Suzuki SX4 is RM90k after I checked it in the website, but then I kept telling people its only RM70k.
I wanted to go to KLCC but asked for a ticket to Masjid Jamek, at the Masjid Jamek station itself. Twice, different days.
I was supposed to buy 5 cinema tickets but after leaving the counter, I just realized that I purchased 6 tickets.
I was looking for remote control on my right-left-right-left. I was actually holding it anyway.
I went to the management office of my apartment at 8.30am, just to realize that it actually opens at 9.00am - though I already checked the opening hours the day before.
DUSH!!
I wanted to go to KLCC but asked for a ticket to Masjid Jamek, at the Masjid Jamek station itself. Twice, different days.
I was supposed to buy 5 cinema tickets but after leaving the counter, I just realized that I purchased 6 tickets.
I was looking for remote control on my right-left-right-left. I was actually holding it anyway.
I went to the management office of my apartment at 8.30am, just to realize that it actually opens at 9.00am - though I already checked the opening hours the day before.
DUSH!!
August 14, 2009
Rindu..
Dalam setiap nafasku, kuteringatkan dirimu
Dalam setiap sepiku, kuterdengar bicaramu
Dalam setiap khayalku, kuterbayang kelibatmu
Dalam setiap geriku, kuterasa pandanganmu
Dalam setiap dukaku, kuterima doamu
Dalam setiap juangku, kutahu sokongmu
Dan aku ingin selalu di sampingmu
Walau terkadang kita terpisah
Namun denganmu adalah indah
Tenang
Dan saat itu pasti datang
Untuk mempertemukan kita
Dan seperti lazimnya
Riak kegembiraanku tidak terserlah semuanya
Begitu juga denganmu
Namun kita tahu
Kasih yang kita rasa
Mama, aku rindu..
Dalam setiap sepiku, kuterdengar bicaramu
Dalam setiap khayalku, kuterbayang kelibatmu
Dalam setiap geriku, kuterasa pandanganmu
Dalam setiap dukaku, kuterima doamu
Dalam setiap juangku, kutahu sokongmu
Dan aku ingin selalu di sampingmu
Walau terkadang kita terpisah
Namun denganmu adalah indah
Tenang
Dan saat itu pasti datang
Untuk mempertemukan kita
Dan seperti lazimnya
Riak kegembiraanku tidak terserlah semuanya
Begitu juga denganmu
Namun kita tahu
Kasih yang kita rasa
Mama, aku rindu..
July 21, 2009
Rupa-rupanya...
Dia pun rase apa yang aku rasa...
Dia pun fikir apa yang aku dah fikir...
Hmmmmmmmmm..................................
Dia pun fikir apa yang aku dah fikir...
Hmmmmmmmmm..................................
July 14, 2009
Need and desire
I hate wanting so much.
I hate wanting so much that I can't even get what I really want.
Whenever I can't get what I really want, I end up frustrated.
Frustrated all by myself.
I've tried to not wanting so much.
But I can't help, of having so much desire for myself,
and wanting so much to fulfill my need.
Until, I reach to a point, where I feel like I should stop from asking so many things in my life.
But it leaves me with worries of being a human without hope, since I'm not wanting anything.
It's 1:04 am now, and I can't stop being sad thinking about this since my attempt trying to get in bed. I'm thinking too much, but I can't help it.
Maybe I'm asking too much, that I forget, that I've been given with so many gifts that I forget to be thankful. I've been so blessed that I don't realise that I don't have much needs anymore, and should not be desiring this and that.
I hate wanting so much that I can't even get what I really want.
Whenever I can't get what I really want, I end up frustrated.
Frustrated all by myself.
I've tried to not wanting so much.
But I can't help, of having so much desire for myself,
and wanting so much to fulfill my need.
Until, I reach to a point, where I feel like I should stop from asking so many things in my life.
But it leaves me with worries of being a human without hope, since I'm not wanting anything.
It's 1:04 am now, and I can't stop being sad thinking about this since my attempt trying to get in bed. I'm thinking too much, but I can't help it.
Maybe I'm asking too much, that I forget, that I've been given with so many gifts that I forget to be thankful. I've been so blessed that I don't realise that I don't have much needs anymore, and should not be desiring this and that.
July 5, 2009
Ada apa dengan nombor?
Lamanye aku x blog..hmmm
***************************
04. Nombor yang aku letak kat email aku. Aku ni mmg tak minat ngan nombor2 ni sbenanye. Tapi, nombor 04 selalu menghantui aku kt digital number display yg aku tgk; jam kt mobile phone aku (ni plg byk), pastu mane2 display yg ade tulis nombor, mcm pukul 3:04, 12:04, etc.. Disebabkan rase saspen dihantui nombor2 yang same ni, maka aku pon letak la nombor ni kat email yg aku pakai..maka lepas tu kurang la sket aku ternampak nombor 04 ni kt mane2..yela sbb dah biasa kan tgk kt email sniri.
No.4 ni xde mende pon utk aku, except that aku ni anak ke-4. Tu je. So aku ade favour jgk nombor ni kadang2, atas sbb tu je..
Cume, lately, ade satu lagi nombor yang telah menghantui aku.. Maka aku pon tak senang duduk jugak la..Yang ni ade gabungan 3 nombor, xxx. Yang ni over sket, sbb nombor 04 tu slalunye aku nampak kt jam digital je, tapi xxx ni aku nampak kt mane2. Creepy. Sampaikan nombor tu jadi terbalik pon aku ade ternampak jugak..Arghhh..yang aku ingat, aku penah nampak xxx ni kat image size mase aku blogging, pastu no. servis ape tah ari tu, pastu ari tu aku bangun nampak nombor ni kat jam tepon aku, n ape tah lagi..Arghhh...yang pasti, aku mmg dari awal2 lagi nampak nombor ni kt ym aku.. sbb ade kt ID sorang mamat ni, n aku mmg slalu gak chatting ngan die (sbb tu nombor ni dirahsiakan..). It's juz that, why now? Ada makna ke??
Tentang seseorang ni, nombor xxx die tu mmg ade nombor 4 jugak. Suratan atau kebetulan, ntah ler. Apa yang dapat aku relate, kitorang dah almost 4 tahun x jumpa each other, sbb jauh. Ada ym je yg boleh kontek. So far, aku anggap die as teman tapi mesra - TTM. Takde la slalu chatting pon, tapi slalu la tegur2 ble ade mase. Kadang2 aku ingat dia x kesah pon kt aku, but sometimes he shows that he cares. But aku rase die mmg caring ngan kengkawan die pon. Cume, mungkin die kurang caring pasal die sniri. Tu part yang aku kureng sket.
What I mean is, die mmg pandai nasihat aku n kengkawan yg len2. Tp ade la mende2 pasal die yg aku rase die kene ubah in caring for himself, for a better him. Mungkin sbb die rase life die skang dah ok, so why bother anything else. Despite of that, 1 thing yang aku sangat aware, aku x pnah rase sakit ati ngan die (so far la). Klu mcm ada tersalah, die mmg dh sorry awal2 (padahal xde mende pon). Aku takkan lupa ni. Sbb die ni tah ape2 jgak orangnye. Otai la jugak. Bila fikir balik, laki2 lain yang berlagak macam bagus, macam baik, ade je yang sakitkan hati orang lain, or don't even bother about others.
Skarang, it looks like it's gonna end somewhere. I don't know where, but since aku akan balik msia x lame lg, n kurang dah mase dpt ym, maka kurang atau x dpt langsung dah la kot nk chatting ngan si dia ni. Plus, lately die mcm dh pelik sket ngan aku. Like, panggil aku ngan nama, pastu chatting ngan aku pasal mende2 yg agak personal (dulu aku yg slalu tanye sbb nk korek samthing ngan die), n, die pnah ckap pasal things yg bunyi lain macam. Xde mende pon, cume as TTM, ptt tak timbul mende tu. Klu gurau2 tu mmg ade la. I like it we are being that way. Nothing personal. Sbb susah kan laki ngan pompuan klu konon2 nk jadi membe rapat je.
Tapi takpelah. Sebelum aku mtak lebih2 dari dia, and die x dpt bagi, aku rase aku nak mengundur diri. Everything has an end kan.. But there are things I won't forget about him:
- die pnah ckap aku pompuan plg tabah die pnah jumpe (dunno if he really meant that)
- die tak pnah bwat aku sakit hati or bengang
- die slalu bwat aku terhibur, tersenyum sendiri, and made me felt OK when things not OK for me
- die x pnah chat tergantung, if he wants to leave, he leaves with manner..
- die slalu ckp pasal mende2 yg boleh motivate aku
- aku x jadikan die tempat mengadu, tp die selalu buat aku bercerita
I better leave it there, before I get more emotional. Post aku dulu - Dari hati turun ke gitar - lagu tu mmg aku tujukan kt die pon (wpon die mmg x tahu). Hopefully lepas ni nombor keramat die tu (xxx) takkan menghantui aku lg, since aku dh express kt sini..walaupun tak visible.
*terasa macam Opie yg bercerita dlm blog die (Dunia Baru season 1)
p/s: I just realised this post is dated as 4 July.. another number 4..huhuuuu. sebbaik bukan nombor xxx tu
***************************
04. Nombor yang aku letak kat email aku. Aku ni mmg tak minat ngan nombor2 ni sbenanye. Tapi, nombor 04 selalu menghantui aku kt digital number display yg aku tgk; jam kt mobile phone aku (ni plg byk), pastu mane2 display yg ade tulis nombor, mcm pukul 3:04, 12:04, etc.. Disebabkan rase saspen dihantui nombor2 yang same ni, maka aku pon letak la nombor ni kat email yg aku pakai..maka lepas tu kurang la sket aku ternampak nombor 04 ni kt mane2..yela sbb dah biasa kan tgk kt email sniri.
No.4 ni xde mende pon utk aku, except that aku ni anak ke-4. Tu je. So aku ade favour jgk nombor ni kadang2, atas sbb tu je..
Cume, lately, ade satu lagi nombor yang telah menghantui aku.. Maka aku pon tak senang duduk jugak la..Yang ni ade gabungan 3 nombor, xxx. Yang ni over sket, sbb nombor 04 tu slalunye aku nampak kt jam digital je, tapi xxx ni aku nampak kt mane2. Creepy. Sampaikan nombor tu jadi terbalik pon aku ade ternampak jugak..Arghhh..yang aku ingat, aku penah nampak xxx ni kat image size mase aku blogging, pastu no. servis ape tah ari tu, pastu ari tu aku bangun nampak nombor ni kat jam tepon aku, n ape tah lagi..Arghhh...yang pasti, aku mmg dari awal2 lagi nampak nombor ni kt ym aku.. sbb ade kt ID sorang mamat ni, n aku mmg slalu gak chatting ngan die (sbb tu nombor ni dirahsiakan..). It's juz that, why now? Ada makna ke??
Tentang seseorang ni, nombor xxx die tu mmg ade nombor 4 jugak. Suratan atau kebetulan, ntah ler. Apa yang dapat aku relate, kitorang dah almost 4 tahun x jumpa each other, sbb jauh. Ada ym je yg boleh kontek. So far, aku anggap die as teman tapi mesra - TTM. Takde la slalu chatting pon, tapi slalu la tegur2 ble ade mase. Kadang2 aku ingat dia x kesah pon kt aku, but sometimes he shows that he cares. But aku rase die mmg caring ngan kengkawan die pon. Cume, mungkin die kurang caring pasal die sniri. Tu part yang aku kureng sket.
What I mean is, die mmg pandai nasihat aku n kengkawan yg len2. Tp ade la mende2 pasal die yg aku rase die kene ubah in caring for himself, for a better him. Mungkin sbb die rase life die skang dah ok, so why bother anything else. Despite of that, 1 thing yang aku sangat aware, aku x pnah rase sakit ati ngan die (so far la). Klu mcm ada tersalah, die mmg dh sorry awal2 (padahal xde mende pon). Aku takkan lupa ni. Sbb die ni tah ape2 jgak orangnye. Otai la jugak. Bila fikir balik, laki2 lain yang berlagak macam bagus, macam baik, ade je yang sakitkan hati orang lain, or don't even bother about others.
Skarang, it looks like it's gonna end somewhere. I don't know where, but since aku akan balik msia x lame lg, n kurang dah mase dpt ym, maka kurang atau x dpt langsung dah la kot nk chatting ngan si dia ni. Plus, lately die mcm dh pelik sket ngan aku. Like, panggil aku ngan nama, pastu chatting ngan aku pasal mende2 yg agak personal (dulu aku yg slalu tanye sbb nk korek samthing ngan die), n, die pnah ckap pasal things yg bunyi lain macam. Xde mende pon, cume as TTM, ptt tak timbul mende tu. Klu gurau2 tu mmg ade la. I like it we are being that way. Nothing personal. Sbb susah kan laki ngan pompuan klu konon2 nk jadi membe rapat je.
Tapi takpelah. Sebelum aku mtak lebih2 dari dia, and die x dpt bagi, aku rase aku nak mengundur diri. Everything has an end kan.. But there are things I won't forget about him:
- die pnah ckap aku pompuan plg tabah die pnah jumpe (dunno if he really meant that)
- die tak pnah bwat aku sakit hati or bengang
- die slalu bwat aku terhibur, tersenyum sendiri, and made me felt OK when things not OK for me
- die x pnah chat tergantung, if he wants to leave, he leaves with manner..
- die slalu ckp pasal mende2 yg boleh motivate aku
- aku x jadikan die tempat mengadu, tp die selalu buat aku bercerita
I better leave it there, before I get more emotional. Post aku dulu - Dari hati turun ke gitar - lagu tu mmg aku tujukan kt die pon (wpon die mmg x tahu). Hopefully lepas ni nombor keramat die tu (xxx) takkan menghantui aku lg, since aku dh express kt sini..walaupun tak visible.
*terasa macam Opie yg bercerita dlm blog die (Dunia Baru season 1)
p/s: I just realised this post is dated as 4 July.. another number 4..huhuuuu. sebbaik bukan nombor xxx tu
June 9, 2009
blog oh blog
Lately aku rase sgt malas untuk memblog..apatah lagi untuk update blog.. Ini bagaikan suatu petanda bahawa aku akan berhenti memblog tidak lama lagi..hmm..ntahlah..best je sbenanye blogging ni..tapi tah la..
mungkin sbb lately aku jarang dapat ilham tentang mende2 yg best untuk ditulis (ditaip). tp kadang2 ade je ilham, tp tak tertaip pulak. atau mungkin aku dah mula rasa bosan. tp boleh pulak aku buat post kali ni kan? mungkin juga aku dah mula merasa malas untuk blog, dan nk concentrate kt aktiviti2 lain pulak yg tangan aku boleh wat selain menaip kt keyboard ni.. seperti memetik gitar, melukis potret, membaca buku2 yg menarik, memasak masakan2 baru, dan banyak lagi la..
aku sbenanye nak sgt bela binatang2 yg comel seperti kuceng, hamster ke, guinea pig ke..mereka sgt comel aww3...tp keadaan skang x mengizinkan la..nnt la aku blk msia bleh concentrate kt hobi tu..aku teringin sgt tgk hamster aku berlari2 dlm bebola pusing2 tu..baru2 ni aku tgk hamster2 kt kdai haiwan yg baru bgn tdo..mamai2..garu2 badan..mate pon xleh bukak..alalala comeyynye..
pastu aku plak x pnah blog dan ckp merepek2 camni..hmm lantakla..but one thing for sure, things change. nothing stays the same. be it small or big change, it will happen. it is happening to me, n people around me.. people that can feel the wave of change will understand what I mean. So, CHASE for what u want. DON'T WAIT until things change, that's gona be TOO LATE..
--
mungkin sbb lately aku jarang dapat ilham tentang mende2 yg best untuk ditulis (ditaip). tp kadang2 ade je ilham, tp tak tertaip pulak. atau mungkin aku dah mula rasa bosan. tp boleh pulak aku buat post kali ni kan? mungkin juga aku dah mula merasa malas untuk blog, dan nk concentrate kt aktiviti2 lain pulak yg tangan aku boleh wat selain menaip kt keyboard ni.. seperti memetik gitar, melukis potret, membaca buku2 yg menarik, memasak masakan2 baru, dan banyak lagi la..
aku sbenanye nak sgt bela binatang2 yg comel seperti kuceng, hamster ke, guinea pig ke..mereka sgt comel aww3...tp keadaan skang x mengizinkan la..nnt la aku blk msia bleh concentrate kt hobi tu..aku teringin sgt tgk hamster aku berlari2 dlm bebola pusing2 tu..baru2 ni aku tgk hamster2 kt kdai haiwan yg baru bgn tdo..mamai2..garu2 badan..mate pon xleh bukak..alalala comeyynye..
pastu aku plak x pnah blog dan ckp merepek2 camni..hmm lantakla..but one thing for sure, things change. nothing stays the same. be it small or big change, it will happen. it is happening to me, n people around me.. people that can feel the wave of change will understand what I mean. So, CHASE for what u want. DON'T WAIT until things change, that's gona be TOO LATE..
--
May 26, 2009
Dari hati turun ke gitar
-
Kukatakan dengan indah
dengan terluka
hatiku hampa
sepertinya luka
menghampirinya
kau beri rasa yang berbeda
mungkin kusalah
mengertikannya
yang kurasa cinta
tetapi hatiku
selalu meninggikanmu
terlalu meninggikanmu
selalu meninggikanmu
kau hancurkan hatiku
hancurkan lagi
kau hancurkan hatiku tuk melihatmu
kau terangi jiwaku
kau redupkan lagi
kau hancurkan hatiku tuk melihatmu
membuatku terjatuh dan terjatuh lagi
membuatku merasakan yang tak terjadi
semua yang terbaik dan terlewati
semua yang terhenti tanpa kuakhiri
_
Kukatakan dengan indah
dengan terluka
hatiku hampa
sepertinya luka
menghampirinya
kau beri rasa yang berbeda
mungkin kusalah
mengertikannya
yang kurasa cinta
tetapi hatiku
selalu meninggikanmu
terlalu meninggikanmu
selalu meninggikanmu
kau hancurkan hatiku
hancurkan lagi
kau hancurkan hatiku tuk melihatmu
kau terangi jiwaku
kau redupkan lagi
kau hancurkan hatiku tuk melihatmu
membuatku terjatuh dan terjatuh lagi
membuatku merasakan yang tak terjadi
semua yang terbaik dan terlewati
semua yang terhenti tanpa kuakhiri
_
May 15, 2009
It's time to fix my life
Alhamdulillah...segala syukur pada Tuhanku..yang telah memberikan aku kesenangan dalam segala kesusahan..
Now I'm breathing again, breathing as a normal human being. Normal as in less stress, less burden, more happiness :)
My final year has been a really tough time.Can't believe it I survived.
Nov 08-Feb 09: Mental damage
I was diagnosed with depression. This mental illness was a natural process in my head. I wasn't depressed because of my grandad dying or someone has been stalking me for years, but it juz happened. Medical students should understand this better. I've been taking anti-depressant pills for months (not acai pills..hehe - omg acai has juz buzzed me!! grrr) and now I've totally recovered.
Feb 09 - April 09: Heart damage
I was emotionally challenged. I had to deal with various personal and financial problems. Alhamdulillah, I managed to mend my heart, with the help of people around me. Thanks, may God rewards you all.
April 09 - May 09: Brain damage
Critical time for dissertation and exams!!! They have made my life mixed-up with everything; my brain transformed into scramble eggs, my hands into super-typing robotic arms and my eyes into fish eyes (have u ever seen fish' eyes when they sleep??). And yes, it has made my life a lot funnier, hee ^^ Anyone that has read my notes in FB should understand this, hopefully I've cheered u up guys. Don't worry, no more notes on brain damage coz my dizzytation is a history!
Now, I'M DONE with all of these damages. It's time to fix my life. Time to clean the mess all around me. Time to catch up with everything I've left before. I realise all this is just a small test for me, from my Creator. I hope I pass with flying colours! This test has made me realise a lot of things; who are my friends and who are not worth to be called friends, I start to see what are the 'nikmat' that God has given me but I've been taking them for granted, and how powerful actually Al-Fatihah can be, to us Muslims.
I dunno which song I should choose to dedicate 2 u all, but nevermind. What is more important, if u all were sincere to me, God knows that, and the angels have been reporting them down in your record book.
Now I'm breathing again, breathing as a normal human being. Normal as in less stress, less burden, more happiness :)
My final year has been a really tough time.Can't believe it I survived.
Nov 08-Feb 09: Mental damage
I was diagnosed with depression. This mental illness was a natural process in my head. I wasn't depressed because of my grandad dying or someone has been stalking me for years, but it juz happened. Medical students should understand this better. I've been taking anti-depressant pills for months (not acai pills..hehe - omg acai has juz buzzed me!! grrr) and now I've totally recovered.
Feb 09 - April 09: Heart damage
I was emotionally challenged. I had to deal with various personal and financial problems. Alhamdulillah, I managed to mend my heart, with the help of people around me. Thanks, may God rewards you all.
April 09 - May 09: Brain damage
Critical time for dissertation and exams!!! They have made my life mixed-up with everything; my brain transformed into scramble eggs, my hands into super-typing robotic arms and my eyes into fish eyes (have u ever seen fish' eyes when they sleep??). And yes, it has made my life a lot funnier, hee ^^ Anyone that has read my notes in FB should understand this, hopefully I've cheered u up guys. Don't worry, no more notes on brain damage coz my dizzytation is a history!
Now, I'M DONE with all of these damages. It's time to fix my life. Time to clean the mess all around me. Time to catch up with everything I've left before. I realise all this is just a small test for me, from my Creator. I hope I pass with flying colours! This test has made me realise a lot of things; who are my friends and who are not worth to be called friends, I start to see what are the 'nikmat' that God has given me but I've been taking them for granted, and how powerful actually Al-Fatihah can be, to us Muslims.
I dunno which song I should choose to dedicate 2 u all, but nevermind. What is more important, if u all were sincere to me, God knows that, and the angels have been reporting them down in your record book.
April 20, 2009
Aku sangat marah dan emo dengan lelaki yang bertuankan nafsu serakah
Aku pun sama rasa terseksa bila baca berita ni. Walaupun gadis ni bukan sedara mara aku, mahupun kawan lama, mungkin kawan baru, tapi dia perempuan macam aku.
******************************
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Gadis dirogol 15 mat rempit
(http://utusan.com.my/utusan/info.asp?y=2009&dt=0419&pub=Utusan_Malaysia&sec=Jenayah&pg=je_01.htm)KUANTAN 18 April - Seorang gadis berumur 17 tahun dirogol bergilir-gilir oleh 15 mat rempit dalam satu kejadian di kawasan ladang kelapa sawit Felda Chini, Pekan pada Selasa lalu.
Ketua Polis Daerah Pekan, Supritendan Yahaya Othman berkata, kejadian berlaku selepas mangsa yang tidak bersekolah itu mengikut ajakan salah seorang suspek untuk bersiar-siar.
Beliau berkata, pada mulanya mangsa menemui dua suspek dikenalinya yang datang dengan dua buah motosikal pada pukul 9.15 malam.
"Mangsa kemudian membonceng salah sebuah motosikal dan dibawa ke sebuah ladang kelapa sawit," katanya ketika dihubungi hari ini.
Menurut Yahaya lagi, sebaik tiba di kawasan ladang itu kira-kira pukul 9.30 malam, muncul pula 13 lagi mat rempit daripada kumpulan berkenaan.
"Mangsa kemudian diraba, kaki dan tangannya dipegang lalu dirogol bergilir-gilir di tempat kejadian sehingga menyebabkan kecederaan teruk di bahagian kemaluannya," katanya.
Beliau berkata, selepas dirogol, mangsa telah dihantar pulang ke rumah seorang rakannya.
Katanya, mangsa bersama rakannya itu kemudian telah pergi ke Hospital Pekan untuk menjalani pemeriksaan dan membuat laporan di Ibu Pejabat Polis Daerah Pekan.
Katanya, berikutan laporan oleh mangsa, polis telah menahan 15 remaja lelaki berumur 17 hingga 19 tahun pada Rabu lalu.
Yahaya berkata, mereka telah direman tujuh hari sehingga 21 April ini untuk siasatan lanjut mengikut Seksyen 376 Kanun Keseksaan.
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Gila ke ape 15 lelaki (kalau betul dakwaan minah tu ada 15 lelaki)? Punya la jahat mereka ni. Siap panggil geng2 lagi. Walaupun penah tgk adegan mcm ni dalam filem Budak Kelantan (stress jgk tgk citer tu), aku xleh bayangkan klu aku jadi budak pompuan tu.
*tak mustahil klu minah tu trauma seumur hidup
*Alat sulit dia komfem rabak, boleh dpt STD, n paling teruk klu mengandung. Pastu takkan tahu mana satu ayah budak tu daripada 15 penjahat wanita tu, unless buat DNA testing
*Mamat2 rempit tu semua mmg keji. Tapi mungkin ada peluang utk kurang sket hukuman kat akhirat sbb diorang tak bunuh minah tu, klu x, xde sape tahu sape dan brape ramai yang menodai dia
*mesti ramai ibu bapa bimbang terkenangkan anak gadis masing-masing yang diberi kebebasan
*pentingnya perempuan dapat pendidikan yang sebaiknya
dan aku sendiri.. sangat bersyukur Alhamdulillah sbb selama aku berseorangan, tak pernah terjadi hal yang mengerikan ini. Tolonglah berjaga2 wahai perempuan2 lain, dan lelaki2 lain, JANGAN JADI HAMBA NAFSU!!
April 8, 2009
I'm no Cinderella
--
"You are a prince charming
But I'm not a princess. Not even a little one.
And I don't want to be your doll either
So please don't be my puppeteer.
I want to live a real life
Not a fairy-tale dream
Or a desire-based drama.
I don't even wish to be a Cinderella."
Moral of the poem: U gotta left your shoe for the prince to return it to u. Otherwise, how could u be a Cinderella?
"You are a prince charming
But I'm not a princess. Not even a little one.
And I don't want to be your doll either
So please don't be my puppeteer.
I want to live a real life
Not a fairy-tale dream
Or a desire-based drama.
I don't even wish to be a Cinderella."
Moral of the poem: U gotta left your shoe for the prince to return it to u. Otherwise, how could u be a Cinderella?
April 7, 2009
I am
.............
torn.
broken.
shattered.
into pieces
skint.
starving.
how to overcome these?
sadist.
pathetic.
am I?
pain?
upset?
no, I'm immuned.
alone.
ignorable.
yes, the world is not over yet.
Welcome to my life.
Welcome To My Life - Simple Plan
........
torn.
broken.
shattered.
into pieces
skint.
starving.
how to overcome these?
sadist.
pathetic.
am I?
pain?
upset?
no, I'm immuned.
alone.
ignorable.
yes, the world is not over yet.
Welcome to my life.
Welcome To My Life - Simple Plan
........
December 23, 2008
Each Other
I need you. But you're not here.
You need me. But I'm not there.
I need them, but they don't need me.
They need me, but I don't need them.
Why. Why can't I be there for you. Why can't you be here for me.
Why can't we all always be together, when we need each other?
We are always tied by the connection of our hearts.
It's juz that,
Time separates us.
Distance separates us.
And sometimes, we separate each other. We are close but we don't feel close.
I need you. All of you who make my world. All my sunshines.
You need me. But I'm not there.
I need them, but they don't need me.
They need me, but I don't need them.
Why. Why can't I be there for you. Why can't you be here for me.
Why can't we all always be together, when we need each other?
We are always tied by the connection of our hearts.
It's juz that,
Time separates us.
Distance separates us.
And sometimes, we separate each other. We are close but we don't feel close.
I need you. All of you who make my world. All my sunshines.
September 30, 2008
Erti raya kali ini
I'm still waiting for announcement. For Eid confirmation.
Either tomorrow or the day after tomorrow.
3rd Eid, overseas.
Sob sob.
*tensyen*
______
Happy Eid Mubarak to all.
Maaf zahir batin. Please forgive me.
Either tomorrow or the day after tomorrow.
3rd Eid, overseas.
Sob sob.
*tensyen*
______
Happy Eid Mubarak to all.
Maaf zahir batin. Please forgive me.
August 20, 2008
Tak tahu
Mid June 2008
Family, beloved family. ‘Long time no see’ relatives. Friends, old friends. Weddings. Food. Food. Food. And
Mid August 2008
In less than 1 month, I’ll be heading back to
Tension. To leave my family. Depressed. Raya away from
Pressure. Nak balik
July 5, 2008
Luahan emo
It seems like every day we’ve been listening to news that some people are getting married while the others are getting divorced. What the heck?
Ada yang jatuh cinta pandang pertama, ada yang baru knal few weeks or months, ade yg bercinta bertahun-tahun lamanya.
Bila dah kahwin, ade yang bertahan for only a year, few months, or not even a month!
Ok, life must go on. When first marriage fails, then come the second. Some succeed, the others kecundang lagi.
This is real life. At one time, we might learn all these are happening to those celebrities, either they are planned to do such thing for publicity purpose or it’s just that they don’t lead a happy life because of conspiracies, scandals, glamour and stuffs like that.
But look around you. Some of you even facing it in your life, maybe you, maybe your family members, maybe your friends, maybe your orang kampong, maybe rumours that you hear, or it can even happen to me.. (naudzubillah)
What’s happening to us? What’s the purpose of falling in love and then.. “That’s it. I’m over it.” I’m sick of knowing all these kahwin-cerai, break-ups, love-hate stuffs. Did God create us to just disappoint ourselves?
Yes, the answer is no.
“Hai manusia, sesungguhnya Kami menciptakan kamu dari seorang laki-laki dan seorang perempuan dan menjadikan kamu berbangsa-bangsa dan bersuku-suku supaya kamu saling kenal mengenal. Sesungguhnya orang yang paling mulia di antara kamu di sisi Allah ialah orang yang paling bertakwa di antara kamu. Sesungguhnya Allah Maha Mengetahui lagi Maha Mengenal.”
God wants us to know each other, to love each other but the most honourable of all adalah orang yang menjadikan dirinya paling bertaqwa from doing what is advisable in these Quran verses.
So get to know more people, from various backgrounds, and benefit from it. Along this way anything will happen, including terminating the relationship that was built. Well it doesn’t sound too bad eh. Because what God counts is the ketaqwaan from it, not the result.
Yeah, it’s easy to talk here since I’ve never been into marriage myself. But I don’t want to repeat mistakes or silliness from history, people’s experiences. And I don’t want other people to do it as well.
“Perceraian akan menjadi kejadian sehari-hari”
(Allamah Safarini, Ahwal Yaum al-Qiyamah of ‘Allamah Safarini)
Like it or not, it is the sign of the Doom’s day. The world is going to end soon. Why not?
Manusia dah hilang nilai2 moral.
Manusia sakit tapi tak dirawat dengan cara yang betul.
Manusia tahu yang benar tapi pilih yang salah jugak.
Manusia tak suka certain kejahatan tapi buat kejahatan yang lain.
Tak heran la kalau yang bersatu pon boleh bercerai.
We are rotten.
July 3, 2008
kalau boleh saya tanak jadi dewasa
Dulu, saya nk
cpat2 jadi dewasa.
Boleh pakai kasut tumit tinggi.
Boleh melaram, mekap2 muka.
Boleh cpat kerja, sbb org slalu tanye cita2 ape.
Boleh pegi mane2 suke.
Boleh bercinta.
Boleh balik rumah lewat malam.
Byk bende lah boleh wat klu dh besa ni.
Lama2, baru saya perasan.
Saya dah x bace komik doraemon, tp magazine cleo.
Saya dah x men masak2 tp mmg masak btol2.
Saya dh lame dpt kunci 21.
Saya dh boleh mengundi.
Saya dh boleh beli minuman keras klu saya nak.
Kawen pon boleh, klu saya nak.
Saya igtkan best jadi dewasa ni.
Saya boleh wat decision sniri, kakak2 saya x boleh marah saya dah.
Saya bukan budak hingusan lg tp mahasiswi universiti.
University saya kt eropah lak tu, x pnah2 saya pk nk pegi oversea.
Klu pegi theme park, seme rides saya boleh naik, xde halangan umor or height.
Dulu saya buat karangan “Saya Seekor Nyamok” tp baru2 ni saya submit essay pasal forensic evidence in courts of law.
Dulu saya mintak papa beli computer sbb nk maen games, tp skarang saya beli computer utk buat assignments n mcm2.
Rupa2nya...
Jadi dewasa ni...
Kene matang.
Kene professional.
Byk tanggungjawab.
Byk masalah, lg byk dr masa remaja dulu.
Byk essay nk kene tulis.
Byk pakai duit.
Xleh byk nanges.
Xleh emo x bertempat.
Kne cari makan sniri.
Kne buat decision, decision, decision.
Kne kawan ngan seme org, biar x same interest pon.
Kne berpada2 kawan ngan kaum adam, perbezaan kaum ni besar maknanya.
And byk lagi la kne, kne, kne, kne, kne.....
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